








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 528 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 274 matches | ||
| Wingman | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2616 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,248 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1280 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1982 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1555 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3431 | 42% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,141,861 of utility $228 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 118 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | auramonster | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | Paulie Walnuts | 56% | 73 |
| #3 | Bambiszon | 52% | 266 |
| #4 | Mako | 50% | 325 |
| #5 | πππFalconπππ | 49% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | auramonster | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | Paulie Walnuts | 56% | 73 |
| #3 | Bambiszon | 52% | 266 |
| #4 | Mako | 50% | 325 |
| #5 | πππFalconπππ | 49% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mako | 51 | 0.0081 |
| #2 | Bambiszon | 49 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | πππFalconπππ | 21 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Paulie Walnuts | 14 | 0.0095 |
| #5 | auramonster | 4 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mako | 432 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #2 | πππFalconπππ | 335 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | Bambiszon | 289 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #4 | Paulie Walnuts | 46 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | auramonster | 43 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mako | +3.90 | 68 | 44 |
| #2 | auramonster | +2.59 | 61 | 37 |
| #3 | Bambiszon | +2.21 | 75 | 32 |
| #4 | Paulie Walnuts | +0.11 | 53 | 19 |
| #5 | πππFalconπππ | -0.30 | 63 | 55 |





