










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 631 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 148 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6391 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,443 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3044 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4181 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2746 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3472 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,499,129 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1922 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツツツツツツツ | 60% | 205 |
| #2 | TOTORON | 60% | 62 |
| #3 | Herslow | 58% | 77 |
| #4 | OBITO.exe | 57% | 80 |
| #5 | pepitoPEEK | 57% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツツツツツツツ | 876 | 0.22 | 18 min |
| #2 | OBITO.exe | 227 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #3 | Herslow | 191 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #4 | TOTORON | 173 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #5 | pepitoPEEK | 97 | 0.14 | 2 min |





