








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 348 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5383 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,974 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1492 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2253 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1469 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2760 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,472,442 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | killmiykul | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | whore.exe | 60% | 47 |
| #3 | Rubyy | 59% | 34 |
| #4 | Clueless | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | NadeZ | 57% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | NadeZ | 57% | 23 |
| #6 | Just1ce | 52% | 31 |
| #7 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 46% | 26 |
| #8 | Jok3r (Auuutistic) | 46% | 26 |
| #9 | edn | 41% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 16 | 0.0260 |
| #2 | Rubyy | 5 | 0.0068 |
| #3 | Just1ce | 4 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | whore.exe | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Clueless | 1 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rubyy | 196 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #2 | Clueless | 143 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| #3 | Just1ce | 141 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #4 | edn | 134 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #5 | ✪ RIDGBAK | 133 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rubyy | +3.22 | 94 | 62 |
| #2 | masseran | +2.29 | 82 | 43 |
| #3 | Jok3r (Auuutistic) | +1.64 | 75 | 37 |
| #4 | ✪ RIDGBAK | +1.12 | 84 | 52 |
| #5 | killmiykul | +1.07 | 63 | 55 |





