










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 26 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1251 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,825 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1069 | 22% |
| Smokes | 791 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1602 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1363 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $789,326 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ralfester | 68% | 28 |
| #2 | noot | 65% | 57 |
| #3 | rassu | 63% | 70 |
| #4 | craitex | 63% | 16 |
| #5 | Leiu | 55% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Leiu | 55% | 51 |
| #6 | | 54% | 184 |
| #7 | Borf | 49% | 41 |
| #8 | Wotzy | 29% | 14 |
| #9 | G4S ✨☹ | 23% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | noot | 15 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | | 12 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Leiu | 6 | 0.0058 |
| #4 | Borf | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | rassu | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | | 517 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #2 | noot | 294 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #3 | Leiu | 142 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #4 | rassu | 97 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Borf | 89 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wotzy | +5.25 | 84 | 66 |
| #2 | noot | +5.15 | 77 | 67 |
| #3 | | +3.85 | 72 | 72 |
| #4 | rassu | +3.33 | 93 | 58 |
| #5 | Ralfester | -1.06 | 31 | 49 |





