










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
264 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 186 | 40% |
| Smokes | 154 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 65 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 63 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $137,709 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cr1mz | 45% | 11 |
| #2 | kick/sh4dow3 | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | tristanprot | 39% | 28 |
| #4 | tuk6969 | 38% | 13 |
| #5 | glaxver | 38% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | tristanprot | 39% | 28 |
| #4 | tuk6969 | 38% | 13 |
| #5 | glaxver | 38% | 37 |
| #6 | ᯓ➤ | 17% | 6 |
| #7 | EST-Pepe | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | glaxver | 10 | 0.0129 |
| #2 | tristanprot | 5 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | tuk6969 | 3 | 0.0115 |
| #4 | Cr1mz | 3 | 0.0132 |
| #5 | kick/sh4dow3 | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tristanprot | 162 | 0.28 | 3 min |
| #2 | glaxver | 72 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | kick/sh4dow3 | 40 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | Cr1mz | 22 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | ᯓ➤ | 7 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tristanprot | +3.08 | 79 | 41 |
| #2 | Cr1mz | +2.92 | 84 | 45 |
| #3 | kick/sh4dow3 | +0.75 | 44 | 65 |
| #4 | glaxver | +0.67 | 65 | 38 |
| #5 | EST-Pepe | -2.58 | 37 | 26 |





