








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 14 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
191 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 897 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 58 | 6% |
| Smokes | 290 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 291 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 258 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $123,056 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dackel | Janis | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | T4k1 | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | DÜNNBRETTBOHRER | 40% | 45 |
| #4 | Skorpion ツ | 39% | 33 |
| #5 | Quastenflosser | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DÜNNBRETTBOHRER | 96 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #2 | Krelreg | 92 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Skorpion ツ | 80 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | GripTapeUser㊌ | 20 | 0.34 | 0 min |
| #5 | Dackel | Janis | 16 | 0.27 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skorpion ツ | +3.95 | 82 | 66 |
| #2 | Quastenflosser | +3.38 | 86 | 72 |
| #3 | DÜNNBRETTBOHRER | +3.26 | 62 | 62 |
| #4 | T4k1 | +1.08 | 88 | 81 |
| #5 | Dackel | Janis | +0.92 | 83 | 67 |





