








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1478 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 593 matches | ||
| Faceit | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




112 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,808 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11918 | 37% |
| Smokes | 8163 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 6517 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 5210 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,942,406 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1119 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fzzy | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | SkyHowl | 54% | 142 |
| #3 | Day | 53% | 118 |
| #4 | DrugPeek | 52% | 44 |
| #5 | Blxnk | 51% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Astonishing D | 2768 | 0.23 | 68 min |
| #2 | Day | 366 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #3 | SkyHowl | 346 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | Blxnk | 322 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #5 | Father Godwin | 191 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SkyHowl | +2.58 | 88 | 60 |
| #2 | DrugPeek | +1.86 | 55 | 62 |
| #3 | Blxnk | +1.22 | 74 | 76 |
| #4 | BingletonCoochiesmith | +0.77 | 69 | 68 |
| #5 | Astonishing D | +0.21 | 63 | 70 |





