








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 23 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Wingman | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1717 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,616 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 679 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1584 | 44% |
| HE Grenades | 630 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 723 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $948,258 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . arturek | 49% | 43 |
| #2 | Kelox997 | 48% | 91 |
| #3 | purchawa | 46% | 70 |
| #4 | misterszyska [ONLYNEGEV] | 45% | 49 |
| #5 | YUNGMIODER [ONLYNEGEV] | 44% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kelox997 | 31 | 0.0194 |
| #2 | krystian to zwykly cwel | 19 | 0.0260 |
| #3 | purchawa | 18 | 0.0131 |
| #4 | misterszyska [ONLYNEGEV] | 17 | 0.0187 |
| #5 | . arturek | 15 | 0.0199 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . arturek | 102 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | YUNGMIODER [ONLYNEGEV] | 76 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | Kelox997 | 51 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | purchawa | 37 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | misterszyska [ONLYNEGEV] | 36 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | purchawa | +2.46 | 70 | 23 |
| #2 | Kelox997 | +1.18 | 44 | 22 |
| #3 | YUNGMIODER [ONLYNEGEV] | +0.95 | 55 | 45 |
| #4 | misterszyska [ONLYNEGEV] | +0.78 | 39 | 17 |
| #5 | . arturek | +0.16 | 28 | 38 |





