








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 182 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 81 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1645 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,635 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1471 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1585 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1245 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1334 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $473,893 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kieren | 50% | 32 |
| #2 | Skeltzy | 50% | 48 |
| #3 | a a ron | 46% | 48 |
| #4 | YaBoiBlue | 44% | 52 |
| #5 | THEGENERAL | 41% | 108 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Skeltzy | 50% | 48 |
| #3 | a a ron | 46% | 48 |
| #4 | YaBoiBlue | 44% | 52 |
| #5 | THEGENERAL | 41% | 108 |
| #6 | Bling | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | THEGENERAL | 15 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | a a ron | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Skeltzy | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | YaBoiBlue | 1 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Kieren | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skeltzy | 120 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | YaBoiBlue | 82 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | THEGENERAL | 63 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Kieren | 40 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | a a ron | 37 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skeltzy | +1.73 | 69 | 59 |
| #2 | YaBoiBlue | +1.63 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | Kieren | +0.23 | 49 | 48 |
| #4 | THEGENERAL | -0.01 | 59 | 38 |
| #5 | a a ron | -0.10 | 61 | 47 |





