








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 279 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Faceit | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3421 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,443 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2450 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2353 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2778 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1862 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,371,244 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 95 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | unti | 79% | 29 |
| #2 | LawLess | 60% | 205 |
| #3 | miracle | 59% | 254 |
| #4 | Niicohaft | 54% | 226 |
| #5 | Fabiihaft | 54% | 105 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | miracle | 59% | 254 |
| #4 | Niicohaft | 54% | 226 |
| #5 | Fabiihaft | 54% | 105 |
| #6 | Totty | 54% | 115 |
| #7 | GeT_RiCe | 35% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Niicohaft | 11 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | miracle | 7 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Fabiihaft | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Totty | 4 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | LawLess | 3 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miracle | 1592 | 0.29 | 40 min |
| #2 | LawLess | 981 | 0.22 | 25 min |
| #3 | Niicohaft | 711 | 0.15 | 20 min |
| #4 | Fabiihaft | 145 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Totty | 143 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | miracle | +2.72 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | LawLess | +2.20 | 69 | 75 |
| #3 | unti | +0.14 | 66 | 63 |
| #4 | Neighbour | +0.02 | 66 | 54 |
| #5 | Niicohaft | -0.43 | 63 | 70 |





