








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1562 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 182 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 136 matches | ||
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




164 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3070 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,343 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4188 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3312 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3597 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3246 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $740,987 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3019 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggzagone | 62% | 68 |
| #2 | Oestrochette | 55% | 121 |
| #3 | Farouk Pinault | 53% | 108 |
| #4 | yap | 50% | 32 |
| #5 | Boyoyote prime | 47% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eggzagone | 62% | 68 |
| #2 | Oestrochette | 55% | 121 |
| #3 | Farouk Pinault | 53% | 108 |
| #4 | yap | 50% | 32 |
| #5 | Boyoyote prime | 47% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oestrochette | 47 | 0.0198 |
| #2 | Farouk Pinault | 35 | 0.0167 |
| #3 | Eggzagone | 12 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | yap | 6 | 0.0102 |
| #5 | Boyoyote prime | 4 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Farouk Pinault | 569 | 0.27 | 13 min |
| #2 | Eggzagone | 424 | 0.32 | 10 min |
| #3 | Oestrochette | 374 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | Boyoyote prime | 305 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #5 | yap | 14 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Farouk Pinault | +6.57 | 81 | 62 |
| #2 | Eggzagone | +4.92 | 77 | 60 |
| #3 | Oestrochette | +3.27 | 64 | 60 |
| #4 | Boyoyote prime | +2.29 | 71 | 53 |
| #5 | yap | -1.50 | 46 | 16 |





