








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1560 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 421 matches | ||
| Wingman | 170 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5027 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,565 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8001 | 26% |
| Smokes | 7145 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 8457 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 6962 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,482,822 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 400 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NickNack | 51% | 69 |
| #2 | Baba Yaga | 49% | 229 |
| #3 | luiccci | 48% | 352 |
| #4 | jyrGi_^ | 48% | 145 |
| #5 | Twisterna | 48% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Twisterna | 48% | 82 |
| #6 | MEISTER=DD | 45% | 176 |
| #7 | ohh boy | 43% | 49 |
| #8 | rashie | 39% | 76 |
| #9 | salaukko =(^^)= | 39% | 112 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luiccci | 29 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Baba Yaga | 12 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | jyrGi_^ | 11 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | MEISTER=DD | 10 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Twisterna | 6 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | luiccci | 935 | 0.14 | 25 min |
| #2 | Baba Yaga | 543 | 0.12 | 13 min |
| #3 | jyrGi_^ | 370 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | MEISTER=DD | 360 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | rashie | 317 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Twisterna | +2.97 | 90 | 53 |
| #2 | jyrGi_^ | +2.48 | 91 | 69 |
| #3 | luiccci | +1.74 | 80 | 63 |
| #4 | rashie | +1.22 | 79 | 71 |
| #5 | NickNack | +0.98 | 85 | 58 |





