








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 170 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1574 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,356 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 525 | 22% |
| Smokes | 341 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 616 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 874 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $106,636 of utility $25 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ♛♡Mikey♡♛(Boosted LE) | 38% | 13 |
| #8 | Jelly | 38% | 50 |
| #9 | Cabbage Dijon | 37% | 30 |
| #10 | Azzy | 37% | 63 |
| #11 | DinoAfro | 34% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Azzy | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | asmo. | 6 | 0.0089 |
| #3 | Cabbage Dijon | 2 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Shockie | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | DinoAfro | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zaden | +10.55 | 93 | 52 |
| #2 | Azzy | +4.00 | 90 | 38 |
| #3 | Shockie | +3.24 | 59 | 61 |
| #4 | ♛♡Mikey♡♛(Boosted LE) | +1.59 | 63 | 49 |
| #5 | Bloody | +0.67 | 17 | 34 |





