








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 705 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 398 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5091 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5527 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5389 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4634 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4324 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,047,169 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 783 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RicheLieu | 63% | 72 |
| #2 | Paradoxx-_- | 58% | 50 |
| #3 | kai | 56% | 32 |
| #4 | Sjowwer | 53% | 271 |
| #5 | SlimShady097 | 50% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sjowwer | 1344 | 0.25 | 28 min |
| #2 | 09apeface | 178 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | neon. | 114 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | Paradoxx-_- | 110 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | charl.meiring | 98 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cloud$ | +2.24 | 67 | 55 |
| #2 | Sjowwer | +0.65 | 52 | 56 |
| #3 | Paradoxx-_- | +0.23 | 63 | 28 |
| #4 | SlimShady097 | +0.03 | 66 | 38 |
| #5 | neon. | -0.18 | 48 | 39 |





