








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1173 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1957 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Faceit | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 106 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




142 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
19927 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 73,939 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 19878 | 27% |
| Smokes | 23827 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 13681 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 16553 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,386,386 of utility $101 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2202 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sicario | 1049 | 0.19 | 27 min |
| #2 | Ranga | 812 | 0.20 | 21 min |
| #3 | Schoolboy | 793 | 0.21 | 18 min |
| #4 | Mumbai Ka Raccoon | 783 | 0.14 | 20 min |
| #5 | beeHop | 671 | 0.26 | 16 min |





