










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 473 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 244 matches | ||
| Faceit | 238 matches | ||
| Wingman | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6112 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,531 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3484 | 20% |
| Smokes | 5990 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3734 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4323 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,423,884 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1364 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gibby | 57% | 74 |
| #2 | Sucki Julo | 55% | 234 |
| #3 | tyrannus | 52% | 364 |
| #4 | pgnd | 51% | 211 |
| #5 | Solid Snake | 50% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | pgnd | 51% | 211 |
| #5 | Solid Snake | 50% | 34 |
| #6 | AcidGrave. | 49% | 51 |
| #7 | Kilg0re | 49% | 198 |
| #8 | Kugel | 49% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tyrannus | 15 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | pgnd | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Kilg0re | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | Sucki Julo | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | AcidGrave. | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tyrannus | 1548 | 0.20 | 38 min |
| #2 | Kilg0re | 612 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #3 | Sucki Julo | 456 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #4 | Gibby | 304 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #5 | pgnd | 247 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Exi | +3.28 | 69 | 59 |
| #2 | Gibby | +0.86 | 81 | 59 |
| #3 | Kugel | -0.02 | 63 | 64 |
| #4 | Kilg0re | -0.35 | 74 | 52 |
| #5 | Sucki Julo | -0.93 | 59 | 48 |





