










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1259 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,797 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 673 | 37% |
| Smokes | 569 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 391 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 164 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $113,205 of utility $40 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 162 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stephern harvey | 47% | 15 |
| #2 | TYPE SHIT | 40% | 20 |
| #3 | Officer Pelmeenid | 35% | 17 |
| #4 | mehhi | 33% | 12 |
| #5 | πΏππ£ππ£π« | 31% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | TYPE SHIT | 40% | 20 |
| #3 | Officer Pelmeenid | 35% | 17 |
| #4 | mehhi | 33% | 12 |
| #5 | πΏππ£ππ£π« | 31% | 16 |
| #6 | Lih Grex | 10% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TYPE SHIT | 5 | 0.0175 |
| #2 | πΏππ£ππ£π« | 4 | 0.0118 |
| #3 | Officer Pelmeenid | 3 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | mehhi | 2 | 0.0088 |
| #5 | Lih Grex | 1 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TYPE SHIT | 31 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #2 | πΏππ£ππ£π« | 29 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Officer Pelmeenid | 27 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | stephern harvey | 15 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | mehhi | 5 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stephern harvey | +5.75 | 87 | 47 |
| #2 | boss toony | +1.06 | 46 | 36 |
| #3 | Lih Grex | -0.55 | 13 | 24 |
| #4 | πΏππ£ππ£π« | -1.33 | 31 | 10 |
| #5 | mehhi | -2.40 | 32 | 14 |





