








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 31 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1161 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,656 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 803 | 22% |
| Smokes | 839 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 956 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1058 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $946,689 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shiroi | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | Luno | 58% | 89 |
| #3 | Nycra | 55% | 29 |
| #4 | Zipfel-Klatscher | 52% | 25 |
| #5 | GeckoFresh | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BALU | 170 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | iBimsDieFeuerwehr | 114 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | nuVo | 94 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Useless69 | 29 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | Nycra | 29 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luno | +4.75 | 48 | 18 |
| #2 | Shiroi | +4.41 | 35 | 20 |
| #3 | iBimsDieFeuerwehr | +4.36 | 64 | 65 |
| #4 | nuVo | +3.05 | 70 | 80 |
| #5 | BALU | +2.92 | 46 | 52 |





