








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1039 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 166 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2388 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,075 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3491 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2973 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2139 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1472 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,097,290 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 291 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOLFSEGGS | 58% | 96 |
| #2 | b_mbyz | 58% | 64 |
| #3 | Nico | 55% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOLFSEGGS | 58% | 96 |
| #2 | b_mbyz | 58% | 64 |
| #3 | Nico | 55% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOLFSEGGS | 15 | 0.0078 |
| #2 | Nico | 9 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | b_mbyz | 5 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOLFSEGGS | 337 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | b_mbyz | 329 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #3 | Nico | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOLFSEGGS | +2.14 | 48 | 51 |
| #2 | b_mbyz | +1.50 | 75 | 62 |
| #3 | Pastrysal | +0.86 | 48 | 53 |
| #4 | Nico | -0.16 | 36 | 28 |





