








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1105 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 683 matches | ||
| Wingman | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 89 matches | ||
| Faceit | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11376 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,237 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10896 | 39% |
| Smokes | 5981 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 8593 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2767 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,388,796 of utility $157 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1426 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rasseews | 50% | 84 |
| #2 | Vincent Masuka | 50% | 408 |
| #3 | Tolonen | 46% | 146 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rasseews | 50% | 84 |
| #2 | Vincent Masuka | 50% | 408 |
| #3 | Tolonen | 46% | 146 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vincent Masuka | 35 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Tolonen | 15 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | Rasseews | 11 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vincent Masuka | 1491 | 0.20 | 33 min |
| #2 | Tolonen | 348 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Rasseews | 36 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pussyripper | +1.65 | 55 | 62 |
| #2 | Vincent Masuka | -0.11 | 39 | 61 |
| #3 | Tolonen | -1.18 | 41 | 51 |
| #4 | Rasseews | -4.02 | 23 | 12 |





