








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 833 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 524 matches | ||
| Wingman | 324 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6908 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,897 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11276 | 35% |
| Smokes | 9856 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 6529 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 4236 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,337,712 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4564 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pussyripper | 50% | 408 |
| #2 | Tolonen | 48% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pussyripper | 50% | 408 |
| #2 | Tolonen | 48% | 167 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tolonen | 29 | 0.0083 |
| #2 | Pussyripper | 20 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pussyripper | 850 | 0.11 | 21 min |
| #2 | Tolonen | 416 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pussyripper | +1.75 | 50 | 62 |
| #2 | Vincent Masuka | +0.56 | 45 | 61 |
| #3 | Tolonen | -0.82 | 39 | 50 |





