








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 287 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 78 matches | ||
| Premier | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1779 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,498 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1075 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1056 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 878 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1489 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $855,312 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | alitadegallo | 61% | 31 |
| #2 | Amend | 59% | 34 |
| #3 | P1nkC4t | 52% | 218 |
| #4 | Sr. Sombra | 52% | 48 |
| #5 | JORDY | 52% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1nkC4t | 18 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | BelloJuan | 14 | 0.0046 |
| #3 | Dmrs | 8 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | Sr. Sombra | 3 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Amend | 3 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P1nkC4t | 698 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | BelloJuan | 460 | 0.15 | 10 min |
| #3 | Dmrs | 141 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | Sr. Sombra | 128 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | JORDY | 116 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Amend | +3.93 | 52 | 61 |
| #2 | ShyLuns | +1.36 | 44 | 47 |
| #3 | P1nkC4t | -0.01 | 23 | 71 |
| #4 | JORDY | -0.12 | 55 | 42 |
| #5 | alitadegallo | -0.96 | 56 | 51 |





