








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2124 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3941 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,083 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4082 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3890 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4618 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3493 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,414,723 of utility $259 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 707 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Makazze | 70% | 114 |
| #2 | Hughie | 65% | 255 |
| #3 | Wolfgang | 59% | 390 |
| #4 | Skovlykke | 57% | 42 |
| #5 | Julebryg_DK (The OG's and Kids) | 56% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Makazze | 70% | 114 |
| #2 | Hughie | 65% | 255 |
| #3 | Wolfgang | 59% | 390 |
| #4 | Skovlykke | 57% | 42 |
| #5 | Julebryg_DK (The OG's and Kids) | 56% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wolfgang | 17 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | Hughie | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Makazze | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Julebryg_DK (The OG's and Kids) | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Skovlykke | 2 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wolfgang | 944 | 0.12 | 23 min |
| #2 | Hughie | 207 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #3 | Makazze | 183 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | Skovlykke | 57 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Julebryg_DK (The OG's and Kids) | 52 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Julebryg_DK (The OG's and Kids) | +1.68 | 29 | 48 |
| #2 | Hughie | +1.57 | 52 | 45 |
| #3 | k1sbf | +1.32 | 43 | 67 |
| #4 | Wolfgang | +0.92 | 13 | 62 |
| #5 | Skovlykke | +0.24 | 29 | 46 |





