








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 501 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1927 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,068 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1002 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1091 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 903 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1072 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $402,262 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 334 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bømlingen | 26 | 0.0187 |
| #2 | XXXGargamelSÆDXXX | 20 | 0.0099 |
| #3 | Johan Pikk | 11 | 0.0100 |
| #4 | Onkel Farfar | 11 | 0.0118 |
| #5 | Glenn Grå Tann | 6 | 0.0164 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Johan Pikk | 148 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #2 | XXXGargamelSÆDXXX | 143 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Bømlingen | 127 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Onkel Farfar | 118 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Dugi | 55 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rask i svingane | +3.66 | 70 | 44 |
| #2 | Dugi | +3.13 | 64 | 60 |
| #3 | Bømlingen | +1.74 | 78 | 42 |
| #4 | Glenn Grå Tann | +1.29 | 41 | 38 |
| #5 | Onkel Farfar | +1.12 | 56 | 55 |





