








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 449 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 696 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3973 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,946 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4056 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4228 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5306 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 3356 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,256,553 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 210 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t0x | 45% | 377 |
| #2 | Big Red | 45% | 247 |
| #3 | attribute | 43% | 418 |
| #4 | Love and Friendship | 41% | 283 |
| #5 | bcboi | 37% | 131 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t0x | 45% | 377 |
| #2 | Big Red | 45% | 247 |
| #3 | attribute | 43% | 418 |
| #4 | Love and Friendship | 41% | 283 |
| #5 | bcboi | 37% | 131 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Love and Friendship | 166 | 0.0274 |
| #2 | t0x | 89 | 0.0109 |
| #3 | attribute | 42 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | bcboi | 20 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | Big Red | 16 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | attribute | 592 | 0.07 | 18 min |
| #2 | Love and Friendship | 569 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #3 | t0x | 202 | 0.02 | 6 min |
| #4 | Big Red | 147 | 0.03 | 4 min |
| #5 | bcboi | 125 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Love and Friendship | +3.55 | 67 | 65 |
| #2 | attribute | +0.17 | 46 | 52 |
| #3 | Who me | -0.86 | 31 | 54 |
| #4 | t0x | -0.96 | 18 | 46 |
| #5 | Big Red | -1.50 | 25 | 38 |





