








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 307 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 149 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1494 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,609 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 847 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1404 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 181 | 5% |
| Molotovs | 1177 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $743,101 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Umi | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | Harryses☭ | 47% | 109 |
| #3 | clementkvd ☭ | 47% | 103 |
| #4 | le_kiwi_me_fait_mal_au_crane | 46% | 24 |
| #5 | Xabbue | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Harryses☭ | 47% | 109 |
| #3 | clementkvd ☭ | 47% | 103 |
| #4 | le_kiwi_me_fait_mal_au_crane | 46% | 24 |
| #5 | Xabbue | 43% | 28 |
| #6 | Sevenüm | 42% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clementkvd ☭ | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Harryses☭ | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | Sevenüm | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Xabbue | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Umi | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sevenüm | 259 | 0.29 | 7 min |
| #2 | Harryses☭ | 192 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | clementkvd ☭ | 127 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | Xabbue | 125 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #5 | le_kiwi_me_fait_mal_au_crane | 78 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xabbue | +2.50 | 67 | 78 |
| #2 | le_kiwi_me_fait_mal_au_crane | +2.32 | 56 | 76 |
| #3 | Harryses☭ | +1.58 | 88 | 64 |
| #4 | AIKOS | +0.60 | 39 | 35 |
| #5 | Umi | +0.04 | 59 | 62 |





