








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 42 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1139 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,292 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1078 | 33% |
| Smokes | 898 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 721 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 595 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $91,857 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SONITOPI<3Seals | 100% | 6 |
| #2 | CraZy | 100% | 7 |
| #3 | Luksu77 | 94% | 18 |
| #4 | BigNisti | 91% | 11 |
| #5 | TorteliiniMasteri | 91% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigNisti | 5 | 0.0265 |
| #2 | 𝑽𝒊𝒃𝒆𝒛𝒛 | 4 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Ted Kaczynski | 4 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | TorteliiniMasteri | 4 | 0.0223 |
| #5 | CraZy | 2 | 0.0192 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ted Kaczynski | 71 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | 𝑽𝒊𝒃𝒆𝒛𝒛 | 58 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | Base Cabba | 58 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | TorteliiniMasteri | 46 | 0.26 | 1 min |
| #5 | BigNisti | 45 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigNisti | +18.95 | 100 | 38 |
| #2 | TorteliiniMasteri | +6.27 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | neNu | +5.48 | 87 | 45 |
| #4 | zimonke | +4.50 | 88 | 62 |
| #5 | CraZy | +2.60 | 96 | 16 |





