








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 29 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
165 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 647 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 113 | 17% |
| Smokes | 176 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 209 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 149 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $72,388 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Elvinus Frontjert Flipperton | 38% | 8 |
| #2 | Wigerl07 | 33% | 3 |
| #3 | dogiteer | 33% | 3 |
| #4 | mushy marlin | 29% | 7 |
| #5 | nsla | 29% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nsla | +8.34 | 91 | 62 |
| #2 | mushy marlin | +3.20 | 51 | 49 |
| #3 | fungus | +1.50 | 28 | 18 |
| #4 | Elvinus Frontjert Flipperton | +1.12 | 6 | 15 |
| #5 | Wigerl07 | -1.08 | 37 | 71 |





