








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 965 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 54 matches | ||
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,198 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2546 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2574 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2914 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1164 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,126,737 of utility $266 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 115 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Satisfaction | 49% | 73 |
| #2 | ✡ | 45% | 22 |
| #3 | g0spel- | 45% | 77 |
| #4 | Munna | 34% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Satisfaction | 49% | 73 |
| #2 | ✡ | 45% | 22 |
| #3 | g0spel- | 45% | 77 |
| #4 | Munna | 34% | 106 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Munna | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Satisfaction | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | g0spel- | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Satisfaction | 439 | 0.29 | 11 min |
| #2 | g0spel- | 221 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Munna | 186 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | ✡ | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Satisfaction | +3.93 | 88 | 78 |
| #2 | g0spel- | +3.15 | 79 | 66 |
| #3 | ✡ | -0.03 | 67 | 25 |
| #4 | Munna | -0.87 | 76 | 49 |
| #5 | Omarlelie | -1.27 | 41 | 50 |





