








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
859 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,045 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 952 | 31% |
| Smokes | 678 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 722 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 693 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $211,671 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pe4ka69 | 82% | 11 |
| #2 | NeonsXN | 75% | 12 |
| #3 | Frostijs | 67% | 9 |
| #4 | Smurfy | 56% | 36 |
| #5 | Nacho ツ | 43% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Smurfy | 56% | 36 |
| #5 | Nacho ツ | 43% | 63 |
| #6 | Tacco ヅ | 40% | 15 |
| #7 | DZHAANIS | 29% | 7 |
| #8 | Martinecs | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nacho ツ | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Smurfy | 2 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | pe4ka69 | 2 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | Frostijs | 2 | 0.0110 |
| #5 | DZHAANIS | 2 | 0.0155 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nacho ツ | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | Tacco ヅ | 50 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | Frostijs | 26 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #4 | Smurfy | 22 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | Martinecs | 20 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NeonsXN | +5.76 | 83 | 60 |
| #2 | Frostijs | +4.81 | 73 | 61 |
| #3 | Tacco ヅ | +2.48 | 69 | 58 |
| #4 | DZHAANIS | +1.78 | 65 | 34 |
| #5 | Smurfy | +0.08 | 69 | 50 |





