








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 161 matches | ||
| Wingman | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2202 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,914 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1993 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1252 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1633 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1036 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $311,765 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RON1N | 61% | 49 |
| #2 | Magician škilko | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | reap | 58% | 43 |
| #4 | John Rambo | 57% | 119 |
| #5 | KeptanAmerika | 56% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | John Rambo | 57% | 119 |
| #5 | KeptanAmerika | 56% | 107 |
| #6 | Oto Oktávius | 54% | 48 |
| #7 | NeoN pjupju ^_^ | 52% | 21 |
| #8 | llaurass | 28% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | John Rambo | 8 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | KeptanAmerika | 8 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | reap | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | Oto Oktávius | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | RON1N | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KeptanAmerika | 559 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #2 | John Rambo | 161 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Oto Oktávius | 109 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | reap | 93 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | RON1N | 61 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RON1N | +6.76 | 89 | 49 |
| #2 | NeoN pjupju ^_^ | +4.61 | 80 | 73 |
| #3 | Ferko | +1.27 | 52 | 52 |
| #4 | reap | +1.13 | 44 | 53 |
| #5 | KeptanAmerika | +0.95 | 58 | 59 |





