








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1651 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 409 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5573 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,651 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4027 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2091 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 3535 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2998 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,432,045 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 554 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRANCISCOVSKI | 52% | 50 |
| #2 | fennec | 46% | 363 |
| #3 | Madouc | 41% | 241 |
| #4 | SeaCowMuffin | 41% | 73 |
| #5 | AmberHero | 37% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRANCISCOVSKI | 52% | 50 |
| #2 | fennec | 46% | 363 |
| #3 | Madouc | 41% | 241 |
| #4 | SeaCowMuffin | 41% | 73 |
| #5 | AmberHero | 37% | 145 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fennec | 14 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | AmberHero | 10 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Madouc | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | SeaCowMuffin | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | FRANCISCOVSKI | 4 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fennec | 270 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #2 | FRANCISCOVSKI | 219 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #3 | Madouc | 197 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | AmberHero | 46 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | SeaCowMuffin | 15 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FRANCISCOVSKI | +6.41 | 74 | 59 |
| #2 | RHINO360 | +2.79 | 43 | 51 |
| #3 | AmberHero | -1.65 | 8 | 17 |
| #4 | Madouc | -1.85 | 16 | 25 |
| #5 | fennec | -3.51 | 13 | 32 |





