








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2044 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 915 matches | ||
| Wingman | 284 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 122 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




87 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9611 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,325 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7435 | 29% |
| Smokes | 6155 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5328 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6407 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,976,827 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7522 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrDog | 54% | 83 |
| #2 | QILTi | 54% | 136 |
| #3 | Wamply | 51% | 235 |
| #4 | Sn0w | 49% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MrDog | 54% | 83 |
| #2 | QILTi | 54% | 136 |
| #3 | Wamply | 51% | 235 |
| #4 | Sn0w | 49% | 270 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sn0w | 13 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | MrDog | 10 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Wamply | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | QILTi | 7 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sn0w | 687 | 0.13 | 18 min |
| #2 | Wamply | 288 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #3 | MrDog | 260 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | QILTi | 146 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | QILTi | +3.26 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | Sn0w | +1.49 | 62 | 57 |
| #3 | iclaps | -0.18 | 42 | 42 |
| #4 | Wamply | -0.98 | 39 | 36 |
| #5 | MrDog | -1.01 | 54 | 54 |





