








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 53 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 100 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
855 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,965 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1542 | 39% |
| Smokes | 1151 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 352 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 920 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $336,726 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 179 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-word:PEEK Jakubik | 63% | 81 |
| #2 | donk666 | 63% | 24 |
| #3 | Kogasz | 62% | 82 |
| #4 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | 62% | 50 |
| #5 | QtotQ | 57% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Kogasz | 62% | 82 |
| #4 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | 62% | 50 |
| #5 | QtotQ | 57% | 82 |
| #6 | ⸸Lunatic⸸ | 50% | 6 |
| #7 | anonimジ | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-word:PEEK Jakubik | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-word:PEEK Jakubik | 304 | 0.20 | 8 min |
| #2 | Kogasz | 288 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | QtotQ | 271 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | 58 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | anonimジ | 33 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kogasz | +1.94 | 69 | 69 |
| #2 | N-word:PEEK Jakubik | +1.69 | 74 | 65 |
| #3 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | +1.12 | 74 | 46 |
| #4 | ⸸Lunatic⸸ | -0.03 | 52 | 55 |
| #5 | donk666 | -0.06 | 67 | 50 |





