








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 240 matches | ||
| Wingman | 95 matches | ||
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6021 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,193 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4962 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4367 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2937 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3927 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,163,698 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NotSmerfik | 63% | 81 |
| #2 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | 60% | 45 |
| #3 | QtotQ | 59% | 69 |
| #4 | donk666 | 59% | 64 |
| #5 | Kogasz | 58% | 277 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | 60% | 45 |
| #3 | QtotQ | 59% | 69 |
| #4 | donk666 | 59% | 64 |
| #5 | Kogasz | 58% | 277 |
| #6 | anonimジ | 42% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kogasz | 23 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | anonimジ | 7 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | donk666 | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kogasz | 1092 | 0.21 | 28 min |
| #2 | NotSmerfik | 352 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #3 | QtotQ | 243 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #4 | anonimジ | 143 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | donk666 | 76 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-word:PEEK Jakubik | +2.02 | 82 | 59 |
| #2 | Kogasz | +1.55 | 72 | 65 |
| #3 | NΞ︎0-NaF4nY) | +0.85 | 71 | 46 |
| #4 | donk666 | +0.04 | 69 | 48 |
| #5 | QtotQ | -0.42 | 53 | 67 |





