








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
85 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 67 | 22% |
| Smokes | 97 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 78 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 56 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $42,180 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xbox_smokes | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | jchopper | 100% | 2 |
| #3 | Arsene Wenger | 57% | 7 |
| #4 | Last Hindu | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | Märkäkoira | 33% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Märkäkoira | 33% | 6 |
| #6 | 4n4lfryer2 | 29% | 7 |
| #7 | pHILEAS BEST | 25% | 4 |
| #8 | vige97 | 25% | 4 |
| #9 | tuumi | 0% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Arsene Wenger | 29 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #2 | 4n4lfryer2 | 23 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #3 | Last Hindu | 12 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #4 | Märkäkoira | 9 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | vige97 | 8 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vige97 | +5.73 | 65 | 58 |
| #2 | jchopper | +4.66 | 61 | 82 |
| #3 | Märkäkoira | +3.65 | 57 | 27 |
| #4 | Xbox_smokes | +1.78 | 50 | 39 |
| #5 | Arsene Wenger | +1.59 | 80 | 65 |





