










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 798 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,981 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2366 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2020 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1861 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2734 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $383,512 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1031 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Borgol | 46% | 24 |
| #9 | Bernkastel | 45% | 60 |
| #10 | ks0 | 45% | 98 |
| #11 | Maffa | 33% | 18 |
| #12 | SteeL/-🇲🇳🔞/ | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ks0 | 8 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | zywoo | 7 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Inegu | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | SteeL/-🇲🇳🔞/ | 2 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | Энхрийлэн | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Inegu | 530 | 0.20 | 13 min |
| #2 | ks0 | 313 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | zywoo | 255 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | Bernkastel | 206 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | hunii uramd shar | 112 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Энхрийлэн | +3.71 | 94 | 62 |
| #2 | zutnux | +3.15 | 82 | 56 |
| #3 | zywoo | +3.10 | 91 | 60 |
| #4 | Inegu | +0.69 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | Borgol | -0.33 | 74 | 51 |





