








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 120 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 142 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
992 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,985 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1614 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1463 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 939 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 969 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $101,121 of utility $28 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | щука | 50% | 106 |
| #2 | sui | 44% | 119 |
| #3 | mleczak (kocham bambi) | 43% | 105 |
| #4 | [DL] Ricardo Milos | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | щука | 50% | 106 |
| #2 | sui | 44% | 119 |
| #3 | mleczak (kocham bambi) | 43% | 105 |
| #4 | [DL] Ricardo Milos | 38% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mleczak (kocham bambi) | 43 | 0.0208 |
| #2 | sui | 37 | 0.0160 |
| #3 | щука | 20 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | [DL] Ricardo Milos | 5 | 0.0115 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sui | 225 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | щука | 83 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #3 | mleczak (kocham bambi) | 58 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | [DL] Ricardo Milos | 52 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | щука | +4.74 | 80 | 48 |
| #2 | sui | +1.00 | 65 | 49 |
| #3 | mleczak (kocham bambi) | +0.40 | 68 | 24 |
| #4 | [DL] Ricardo Milos | -2.50 | 52 | 54 |
| #5 | [DL] adik | -3.54 | 24 | 42 |





