








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
401 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 936 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 554 | 59% |
| Smokes | 203 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 30 | 3% |
| Molotovs | 149 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $94,767 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matthew | 67% | 3 |
| #2 | Ed Raket | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Bradley | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Tristan | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | Jari | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Albert heijn | 11 | 0.0166 |
| #2 | Tristan | 6 | 0.0368 |
| #3 | Milan.K | 4 | 0.0870 |
| #4 | Jari | 3 | 0.0166 |
| #5 | Druiv | 2 | 0.0072 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tristan | +0.83 | 52 | 56 |
| #2 | Bradley | +0.50 | 17 | 21 |
| #3 | Albert heijn | +0.34 | 42 | 33 |
| #4 | Citroen | +0.01 | 61 | 36 |
| #5 | Druiv | -1.17 | 34 | 33 |





