








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 756 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 139 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3880 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,404 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3821 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2007 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2269 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1307 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $770,246 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 314 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | vok | 45% | 292 |
| #10 | Miika | 41% | 39 |
| #11 | Jix | 41% | 44 |
| #12 | not Zore | 41% | 49 |
| #13 | T4V33 | 26% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vok | 84 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | Fentmaxxer G.Floyd 2552020 | 39 | 0.0165 |
| #3 | trendd | 35 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | -blank- | 28 | 0.0131 |
| #5 | Glonkert Kolmas | 21 | 0.0097 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trendd | 940 | 0.28 | 26 min |
| #2 | vok | 751 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #3 | not Zore | 228 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #4 | -_PERCS_- | 218 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | -blank- | 216 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | trendd | +6.91 | 85 | 68 |
| #2 | vok | +3.50 | 82 | 62 |
| #3 | 76561199836961152 | +2.89 | 92 | 67 |
| #4 | tuketzki | +2.01 | 67 | 57 |
| #5 | Glonkert Kolmas | +0.39 | 64 | 28 |





