








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 888 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 653 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 82 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5425 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11994 | 25% |
| Smokes | 14224 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 12347 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 10136 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,316,853 of utility $75 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 192 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | ShagyBoy | 45% | 231 |
| #8 | zukis | 44% | 105 |
| #9 | Priekšnieks | 44% | 64 |
| #10 | Goliats | 43% | 161 |
| #11 | RolfY #standwithukraine | 41% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShagyBoy | 518 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| #2 | Ceļusargs | 516 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #3 | Goliats | 330 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #4 | ✪ Piita | 264 | 0.20 | 7 min |
| #5 | Priekšnieks | 148 | 0.11 | 4 min |





