








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 128 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1277 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,801 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 693 | 25% |
| Smokes | 647 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 835 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 626 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $300,619 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 447 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SONYK | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | ERROR 404 | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | ReTz | 55% | 40 |
| #4 | Nikoj | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | Tibby™ | g4skins | 33% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ERROR 404 | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | ReTz | 55% | 40 |
| #4 | Nikoj | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | Tibby™ | g4skins | 33% | 39 |
| #6 | Maksipiksi | 26% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tibby™ | g4skins | 8 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | ReTz | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | ERROR 404 | 4 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | Maksipiksi | 2 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | SONYK | 2 | 0.0106 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ReTz | 169 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | ERROR 404 | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Nikoj | 21 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | SONYK | 11 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | Tibby™ | g4skins | 9 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ERROR 404 | +2.16 | 70 | 50 |
| #2 | SONYK | +1.63 | 71 | 49 |
| #3 | ReTz | +1.44 | 71 | 69 |
| #4 | Nikoj | +0.74 | 59 | 59 |
| #5 | Kiyotaka Ayanokōji | +0.61 | 59 | 40 |





