








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 26 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
632 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,297 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 400 | 31% |
| Smokes | 304 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 181 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 412 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $204,012 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ERROR 404 | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | betterr.♡. | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | ReTz | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | Kiyotaka Ayanokōji | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | L00m_ | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ERROR 404 | 56% | 9 |
| #2 | betterr.♡. | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | ReTz | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | Kiyotaka Ayanokōji | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | L00m_ | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | betterr.♡. | 14 | 0.0194 |
| #2 | L00m_ | 10 | 0.0282 |
| #3 | Kiyotaka Ayanokōji | 1 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | ERROR 404 | 1 | 0.0055 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ReTz | 75 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #2 | betterr.♡. | 34 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Kiyotaka Ayanokōji | 23 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #4 | L00m_ | 21 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | ERROR 404 | 17 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nikoj | +2.38 | 64 | 43 |
| #2 | ERROR 404 | +2.29 | 57 | 44 |
| #3 | ReTz | +0.77 | 63 | 68 |
| #4 | L00m_ | +0.77 | 88 | 42 |
| #5 | betterr.♡. | -1.29 | 49 | 29 |





