








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 78 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
984 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,225 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 306 | 9% |
| Smokes | 779 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1300 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 840 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $184,210 of utility $62 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !! FiZeL !! | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | dark ropz | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | toothless | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | Frogzy | 51% | 35 |
| #5 | Vortex | 50% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | toothless | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | Frogzy | 51% | 35 |
| #5 | Vortex | 50% | 70 |
| #6 | ✪ dŽralek | 49% | 68 |
| #7 | FrFlajS | 37% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vortex | 13 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | ✪ dŽralek | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | !! FiZeL !! | 4 | 0.0238 |
| #4 | Frogzy | 3 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | toothless | 3 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vortex | 237 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | Frogzy | 134 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #3 | dark ropz | 95 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | toothless | 67 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | FrFlajS | 58 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !! FiZeL !! | +3.43 | 67 | 61 |
| #2 | Vortex | +1.81 | 62 | 66 |
| #3 | ✪ dŽralek | +1.44 | 84 | 34 |
| #4 | toothless | +1.38 | 74 | 46 |
| #5 | dark ropz | +0.14 | 64 | 44 |





