








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 955 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 306 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5602 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,864 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1413 | 14% |
| Smokes | 3151 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2334 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2966 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,906,776 of utility $238 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 254 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JIRU | 67% | 36 |
| #2 | Díomách Opal | 55% | 42 |
| #3 | . | 54% | 41 |
| #4 | TicKz #Silverspray | 53% | 34 |
| #5 | Nandinioz™ #counter-strafing-gud | 50% | 137 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | David W | 1012 | 0.10 | 25 min |
| #2 | Wajja | 365 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #3 | Nandinioz™ #counter-strafing-gud | 346 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | bashout. | 235 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #5 | SyotoS | 150 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Díomách Opal | +3.63 | 87 | 55 |
| #2 | JIRU | +2.62 | 78 | 71 |
| #3 | bashout. | +2.43 | 82 | 62 |
| #4 | TicKz #Silverspray | +1.77 | 71 | 64 |
| #5 | David W | +0.93 | 74 | 59 |





