








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 312 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 208 matches | ||
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2645 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,063 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2906 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3305 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3612 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2240 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $370,352 of utility $45 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | HUBERT | 46% | 137 |
| #6 | agentti | 43% | 42 |
| #7 | Patrick Star | 42% | 113 |
| #8 | Lewis Donk | 41% | 124 |
| #9 | Nakkivene87 | 39% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HUBERT | 10 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Salttfish | 9 | 0.0059 |
| #3 | pxuli | 6 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | Lewis Donk | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | agentti | 5 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HUBERT | 248 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Salttfish | 245 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | Lewis Donk | 216 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | Nakkivene87 | 155 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | agentti | 139 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pxuli | +4.60 | 68 | 39 |
| #2 | Patrick Star | +2.79 | 58 | 49 |
| #3 | Keisari | +1.94 | 70 | 53 |
| #4 | agentti | +0.77 | 54 | 43 |
| #5 | Salttfish | +0.68 | 53 | 45 |





