










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 48 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 190 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1450 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 991 | 13% |
| Smokes | 2507 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2175 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2200 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $377,151 of utility $77 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 313 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeeDez | 48% | 116 |
| #2 | aefnor | 46% | 112 |
| #3 | JRK876 | 45% | 40 |
| #4 | Vivid | 43% | 97 |
| #5 | TheUncertainJuan | 42% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeeDez | 48% | 116 |
| #2 | aefnor | 46% | 112 |
| #3 | JRK876 | 45% | 40 |
| #4 | Vivid | 43% | 97 |
| #5 | TheUncertainJuan | 42% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aefnor | 11 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Vivid | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | JRK876 | 3 | 0.0036 |
| #4 | TheUncertainJuan | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | BeeDez | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aefnor | 284 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | BeeDez | 248 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #3 | Vivid | 199 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | JRK876 | 55 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | TheUncertainJuan | 47 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheUncertainJuan | +1.36 | 61 | 54 |
| #2 | aefnor | +1.35 | 60 | 61 |
| #3 | BeeDez | +0.67 | 61 | 56 |
| #4 | JRK876 | -0.74 | 54 | 52 |
| #5 | AsapChasap | -0.80 | 46 | 52 |





