








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 118 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2052 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,847 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1510 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1216 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1649 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1472 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $591,997 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Choki | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | skytidx8 | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Luizito | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | ABSU | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | Baxton | 43% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | skytidx8 | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Luizito | 53% | 36 |
| #4 | ABSU | 48% | 21 |
| #5 | Baxton | 43% | 54 |
| #6 | Gorsky | 42% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luizito | 10 | 0.0131 |
| #2 | Baxton | 8 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | Gorsky | 2 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | ABSU | 1 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baxton | 268 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | Gorsky | 175 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | Luizito | 164 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #4 | ABSU | 63 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | skytidx8 | 46 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | skytidx8 | +2.56 | 77 | 75 |
| #2 | Baxton | +0.85 | 84 | 52 |
| #3 | Stunz | +0.49 | 71 | 58 |
| #4 | Gorsky | -0.05 | 60 | 61 |
| #5 | Luizito | -1.27 | 49 | 55 |





