








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 109 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 286 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




67 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3269 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,850 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5353 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4407 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3932 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3158 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $954,073 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 270 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaBy YoDa | 56% | 34 |
| #2 | AnalBaiter | 50% | 24 |
| #3 | zDaex | 50% | 28 |
| #4 | milky | 49% | 163 |
| #5 | TheRaga | 49% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | FireMexRPM | 44% | 102 |
| #9 | ✪ fernando-232018 | 42% | 95 |
| #10 | 𝔇𝔢𝔲𝔰 𝔞𝔟𝔰 | 40% | 25 |
| #11 | Dc simi | 40% | 60 |
| #12 | Bmo1zlNd | 39% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | milky | 51 | 0.0151 |
| #2 | ✪ fernando-232018 | 35 | 0.0174 |
| #3 | Dc simi | 26 | 0.0203 |
| #4 | 𝔇𝔢𝔲𝔰 𝔞𝔟𝔰 | 13 | 0.0240 |
| #5 | GerZe | 12 | 0.0273 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ fernando-232018 | 861 | 0.43 | 17 min |
| #2 | milky | 514 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | FireMexRPM | 469 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #4 | Dc simi | 331 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #5 | GerZe | 234 | 0.53 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GerZe | +2.90 | 71 | 74 |
| #2 | ✪ fernando-232018 | +1.13 | 81 | 60 |
| #3 | 𝔇𝔢𝔲𝔰 𝔞𝔟𝔰 | +1.05 | 71 | 60 |
| #4 | Bmo1zlNd | +1.03 | 68 | 64 |
| #5 | milky | +0.74 | 69 | 61 |





