








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2448 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 783 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




85 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10811 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,437 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9948 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5396 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 12261 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 6832 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,740,597 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2534 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haisenburger | 47% | 141 |
| #2 | Stele98 | 46% | 539 |
| #3 | Waginator | 44% | 209 |
| #4 | kevendster | 40% | 313 |
| #5 | osnadizeli | 39% | 189 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Waginator | 44% | 209 |
| #4 | kevendster | 40% | 313 |
| #5 | osnadizeli | 39% | 189 |
| #6 | picle | 29% | 65 |
| #7 | titler | 29% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | osnadizeli | 26 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Stele98 | 20 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Waginator | 20 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | haisenburger | 17 | 0.0060 |
| #5 | kevendster | 6 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stele98 | 644 | 0.06 | 13 min |
| #2 | osnadizeli | 358 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | haisenburger | 333 | 0.12 | 10 min |
| #4 | kevendster | 182 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #5 | titler | 131 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shautra | +2.41 | 79 | 74 |
| #2 | haisenburger | +1.42 | 54 | 75 |
| #3 | Stele98 | -0.95 | 61 | 71 |
| #4 | Waginator | -1.15 | 47 | 50 |
| #5 | picle | -1.90 | 67 | 27 |





